What is Love Really?

I have been through a lot with my kids father over the past few years. In the beginning it was okay because I think I was feeling how being in love felt. But in all reality I don't think I was really in love to begin with. In the beginning it was all good but after all the glitter went away I saw the truth. Now that I look back at the relationship, I regret ever messing with him in the first place. Only because it was signs then that i didn't pay attention to. Like he was a jerk and was full of himself when we were just friends and I didn't really like him then either. But I got two beautiful children out of the relationship that I cherish with all my heart and wouldn't know what to do if they weren't here. As the years go by I realize that I was putting myself down over and over again. I tried staying with him for the kids and i was close to his sister, but I was so miserable inside but didn't know how to change or let it go. I've experienced physical and emotional abuse for the first time with him and the feeling wasn't for me but I stayed. When I see other women stay in abusive relationships I feel bad for them because I was once in one myself but I seen what it was doing to myself and kids. In my relationship with him I spent my every minute/time with him, began to stop going out, hanging with friends and other numerous things. I regret letting someone have so much power over my life, I have learned that it's not healthy to put yourself in a situation like that. I began to become a different person, I didn't like or enjoy doing anything, kept to myself, was angry all the time and just in a negative mind set. I've done things that I cannot take back and wish I would've thought more before I done them, but you learn from your mistakes. I am starting to get my life back after 3 years and I am beginning to to like the woman I am becoming. I want to set a good example for my children to look up to. Don't want them to think that it's right to be treated that way and what love is. With all this being said I'm growing up and learning to love myself first before I let anyone else love me, because if you don't love yourself first then you wont know what love is when it comes around to find you.